I’ve actually assembled more than ten things church members have told pastors immediately after they preached. But these are ten responses where pastors have had the most visceral reactions.
- “I am going to be late for lunch because you preached so long.”
- “You must not have had much time to prepare that sermon.”
- “My former pastor preached a much better sermon from that text.”
- “I wish {fill in the blank} would have heard that sermon.”
- “You act like you weren’t feeling well while you preached.”
- “I’m sorry I fell asleep while you were preaching. Your voice just puts me to sleep.”
- “Your subject/verb agreement was incorrect three times in your sermon.”
- “I wish you wouldn’t preach from the Old Testament.”
- “Let me tell you what you missed in your sermon.”
- “Are we ever going to be done with this sermon series?”
Pastors often take 10 to 20 hours to prepare a sermon. They pray for God to speak through them. They preach with conviction and fervency. And then they hear one of these sentences.
These ten responses are close approximations of what pastors have actually told me. I am sure there are many more. Let us hear what they are.
Posted on March 2, 2015
With nearly 40 years of ministry experience, Thom Rainer has spent a lifetime committed to the growth and health of local churches across North America.
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231 Comments
my favorite is when people come up to you before the sermon and drop the bombs. Then trying to get it off your mind and preach.
Yep. See my post on speaking to the pastor right before he preaches.
Don’t tell the pastor he had a great sermon when he didn’t preach that Sunday. It’s happened to me — more than once!
Another ouch!
I can relate to most of these. In my case, there is one person who, when they do make a comment, it is always something negative. I’ve had to learn to just brush it off. This person is always sure I’ve offended someone in some way. Thanks for the other comments. They let me know I’m not alone in this.
We are all there with you. I’ve had those in some of my churches.
You are most definitely not alone, Jerry.
After months of negative responses, my husband nicely told the person they had the gift of discouragement. Surprisingly the negative comments to him stopped.
Winner! Comment of the day.
That is awesome, Tanya. I might have to steal that one. There are a few on Twitter that would apply to. 😉
Yes, that is a good response! Alas, many church members have that gift.
you alienated several people with that sermon.
Actually got that one in a letter.
The gospel has a way of doing that.
I used to teach Sunday School in a small church. I taught through James. The pastor said he would let me preach a series. I started preaching on 1 Peter. After a few weeks, he says to me, right after church, “You have been on 1 Peter for a month and you’re still on chapter 1. Are you a teacher or a preacher?” My response, was, “Where’s the fire?” It seems people don’t want to listen to long series on a book. This was several years ago, but I have found there are people who want to listen to a solid expository sermon. Not every time…I once preached on Psalm 46 in a church that taught a prosperity gospel and they did not want me back. I am always willing to work on my preparation and delivery, but I will not water down the message just to tickle the people’s ears.
Amen. Thank God for those who still preach from a commitment to the Word of God.
Keep staying true to the Word!
“I will not water down the message just to tickle the people’s ears.”
Nor should any of us. Keep on preaching the Word faithfully!
My pastor taught a sermon series on Acts that lasted almost 2 years a few years back. He would sometimes spend weeks preaching on a single verse. We joke about how long it took now, but it really doesn’t matter. He spoke truth in every sermon and taught applicable and convicting lessons each week. He used his God-given knowledge and understanding of the Word to help us break down God’s truths and partake in the wisdom it provides. The length of time spent on a sermon series should not be the congregation’s focus, but rather the content and truth of the Word presented throughout it.
I’m not a pastor, but I do a fair share of pulpit supply. One of my pet peeves is those folks who see Kentucky Basketball (Or any sport) as a religion.
While I’m a card carrying member of The Big Blue Nation, I keep getting reminded that the Cats play at 1 o’clock. I usually remind people that I have a DVR and I know how to program it.
So true. See my post on college football.
“One of my pet peeves is those folks who see Kentucky Basketball (Or any sport) as a religion.”
AMEN, BROTHER!!! As you can tell, that’s one of my pet peeves, too.
At my church, the Kentucky basketball would be replaced by the line at Kentucky Fried Chicken. Still, same sentiment! Even as a regular church member those comments annoy me.
As I’m reading the comments I start composing a similar list of things not to say to a woman after she has spent several hours in the kitchen prepaing a meal. lol
Now that’s funny.
Funny, and a good point!
I guess for me there are several that come up, some regularly : (1) Who were you talking to in your sermon? (apparently feels pastors use pulpit to beat people up) ; (2) There was a misspelling in the bulletin/you didn’t list this in the announcements (really? more concerned with a misspelling than worship?) ; (3) I’ll pray with you about “topic X”, I don’t think it will work, but I’ll pray (O ye of no faith …) ; (4) Why don’t you preach more on all the good things people do, especially social ministries, and make everyone feel good? (ahhh, the feel good gospel) ; (5) We’ve run over time several times in the last few weeks; you should let nursery and children’s church people know ahead of time so they can prepare; some of us have things to do.
Good additions!
I haven’t heard any except 2 of them. I have had number 5 said to me many times. Each time I was not feeling well physically that morning. I have a habit of preaching even when I am sick, have a cold or not feeling well. I usually have to be very sick with a known fever or something to not preach. Funny thing is for that 30 minutes or so I have a lot of energy but before and after you can tell I would not be feeling well.
Number 7 is one I used to hear a lot from my wife and now from my children. It isn’t subject verb agreement but how many times I would say “ain’t” from my wife and “um” from my kids. They get a kick out of it and so do I. Sometimes I will say these just to keep them going. But it also has helped me be more aware of my words. Often now I catch myself before saying “um” and pause a moment before the next word. I have my kids to thank for that.
Our families can indeed be painfully honest!
It wasn’t painful and isn’t painful. I have never thought of it as painful. It has been very helpful. It helped me be more aware of my words, more so than my seminary professor in my preaching class; Dr. Cox at Southern. The class was scary. Maybe because I knew I was being critiqued. But with the kids we have fun with it. It keeps them engaged and it still does even at 17 years old. I even learn from them.
Why not post what positive comments you have gotten as pastors? I am sure we lay people can use some help in that area.
There are some in the comments, Vicki. But your thought is a good idea for a future post.
“That was a powerful sermon today.”
“Good sermon, Pastor.”
Those are fine responses. My preferred are:
“I was really challenged to (insert response).”
“I had never realized (insert reply).”
“That was exactly what I needed today.”
Only use the later type if it is true. A simple, “thanks” or no comment works fine when warranted.
The coolest are days or weeks later when someone mentions the sermon and how God used it in their life. Those are as rare and precious as rubies.
Some of my favorites are….
1) Tell me more about what ____ means.
2) That really spoke to me! Now I am going to do _________!
3) Thank you (accompanied by tears in eyes or a big grin).
4) That was really difficult/challenging. I need to chew on that some more.
I should say also, though, that the best comment I get is not the one right after the sermon. The best compliment I get is when people are still talking about a particular sermon several weeks later. I doesn’t happen often, but when it does, I know that sermon made a difference.
Vickie,
Do you realize that your comment is exactly the kind the main article is referencing?
That was a very kind response from you, Thom.
“Isn’t the service only supposed to last an hour?”
This after great worship, 3 Baptisms, and a senior adult giving their heart to Jesus.
Very discouraging for this Pastor.
That does hurt indeed.
Don’t take it too hard, Anthony. If God is moving like that in your church, you’re doing something right. If people don’t like it, that’s their loss.
Could be worse, Anthony. Jer 26:8 😉
Hey Anthony. Love your name btw. I’ve had that (or at least something similar) several times in my ministry. It is aggravating. I just keep having to remember that after great Godly victory comes great trash-talk from Satan. Not that your church member is Satan, but their words can sure be influenced by him. Keep your head up brother.
I’ll take a long service every week if we get results like that! The source of those kinds of comments comes from the Enemy who does not like what he sees. You’re on the right track! Keep pressing on! Praying for you!
Thom, my all time favorite: “I quit listening before you quit preaching.”
Response: “Permission granted.”
While it does hurt sometimes a sense of humor can help. More times than not the knuckleheaded comments are outweighed by the appreciative ones.
Thanks for the encouragement.
Thank you as well, Tom.