By Thom S. Rainer
In any organization of size, there are likely angry people.
They are unhappy with the organization. They don’t like change. They don’t like the leader.
But here’s the catch: In most organizations, they are a distinct minority. I use the quantifier of ten percent more anecdotally than not, but I would conjecture most organizations, including churches, would have a number close to that.
In churches, I see pastors, again and again, yield to the pressures and criticisms of the ten percent. I get it. I’ve been there and done that. May I suggest some perspectives on this issue? Perspectives are not solutions, but they can help us persevere when the ten percent get really loud.
- Ten percent can seem like a lot of people. Indeed, if your church has 200 active members, 20 loud critics can seem really loud. Brad Waggoner calls it “the power of negativity.” He says the negative person has a tenfold voice in the organization compared to the neutral and positive people.
- Realize that the ten percent will take advantage of any forum you give them. They love to speak up in business meetings. They love to be the big voice in listening sessions and surveys. In fact, listening sessions can make the rest of the organization demoralized as the more positive members think the negative people are the norm.
- The ten percent want you to think there are more of them. They will use phrases like, “Everyone says . . .” or “People are saying . . .” They not only can be negative; they can be downright deceitful.
- While you want to have open communications, the ten percent will often dominate the rest of the voices in the church. Such is the reason you need to be careful about giving them the platforms and opportunities to spread their negativity.
- The ten percent love social media. They are often the most vicious when they are hiding behind a keyboard. If you wonder why you are getting sick of social media, it’s because the ten percent live there. They love the megaphone that makes their voices seem louder than they really are.
- The ten percent often are on church rotations. If they can’t get their way, they will move to another church where they can spread their negativity. Be cautious of people who want to transfer to your church if they have nothing but negative things to say about their current church.
- The ten percent often lead church splits. They will be happy at their new place . . . until they don’t get their way completely. They will then be ready to spread their negativity at the new congregation. Such is the reason so few church splits do well.
This overview is just one of many perspectives rather than solutions. If you feel like most people are against you in your church, you are likely wrong. It’s probably the ten percent. But they do have the loudest voices in your congregation.
Posted on January 13, 2020
With nearly 40 years of ministry experience, Thom Rainer has spent a lifetime committed to the growth and health of local churches across North America.
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66 Comments
Read the commments here on this post and ask yourself, “why would anyone want to go to church, get involved or be exposed to a toxic culture like those described?” Doesn’t sound like an reasonable alternative to the secular world.
Sounds like it’s worse.
We have the same problem in our church, but being Deaf in the Deaf Connection Group, we pray for a solution to those 10% if, when and what would Jesus do. Put yourselves in Jesus’ place as in John 8:1-11 when the Pharisees repeatedly asks Jesus what would He do with this woman? What is the answer to those 10%? We’ve prayed about it to get the answers (James 1:5, 5:15).
Trying to learn how to keep the 10% from driving off so many of the 90.
They are small in number, but powerful enough that they’ve driven off many of the rest.
What to do when you feel beaten down by the 10% that won’t quit!
The angry 10% would rather control the church. they would like to stronghold the minister however they can. Their last shenanigan was to tell minister people were not connecting to his message. Really? I said that is not what I am hearing. Next Sunday I had ushers hand out one question survey. Only 4 no’s ( the angry 10%) and all the rest were positive. Caught their BS.
My husband and I are new to the pastors (4 yrs.), But not new to church politics. We h ave a suggestion/complaint Box that is getting out of hand. I think it should go away, to not go e the negative 10% a platform. The church is growing & it is being revitalized. But those who have been negatively controlling the church are losing th at control and are on the warpath. We have to go deeper i to prayer.
We’ve eliminated all avenues of anonymity. If one cannot sign their name so that a conversation can be initiated, then whatever needs to be said is not that important. That includes everything – including the coffee is too strong or the outside light needs replaced. Without a signature, it is straight to the shredder.
As the first female pastor at this church, it has taken nearly 4 years and a very thick skin (and some tears!) to change the composition of the leadership, stand up to the bullies and nay-sayers and encourage people to find another ‘church home’ that better suits their desires. And we are seeing positive change and growth, but the road has been very hard.
Good for you! Anonymity in this instance is a cancer.
Well….. except for the coffee ….alls fair when it comes to the coffee ☺☺
When the 10% say “people are saying,” I am not sure they mean to be deceitful. I think often the 90% just politely nod instead of standing up to the bullies, leaving the bullies emboldened and with a false sense that they are the majority.
So true.
The more I study, the more I get concerned about wanting to be a pastor. lol.
For what it’s worth, I dobt think you’re meant to be a pastor (at least not in our modern sense of the word). You’re meant to be a disciple who happens to be pastoring, or making pizzas or whatever Jesus directs you to be at any given point. ☺
Go from that perspective and you’ll likely find the freedom and perspective that will sustain you.
Indications are that Jesus didn’t go around thinking of himself as primarily “the/a Messiah”.
He did however see Himself as a disciple – of the Father.
Just some thoughts.
Blessings
Many good points to ponder, but I have a few “what if’s” to ask.
What if the 10% are God’s faithful remnant and leadership really is leading astray?
What if growing numbers are happening because itching ears are being scratched rather than the gospel preached?
Our wonderful pastor teaches us regularly that he is not going to preach “to numbers” but preach the gospel. If that results in growth, fantastic! If the lost reject the truth and we dwindle down, that is in our Lord’s capable hands.
I could join the angry 10% in a heartbeat if I went to church Sunday and he was suddenly telling us we had to soft pedal the truth, or water down the truth, or make church and worship seem less churchy and worship (is that a word lol?) and not talk about Jesus to raise the number of backsides and bucks coming in.
Tell us how we can be supporters of excellent leadership, rejecters of false prophets, and avoid being part of the angry 10%? Perhaps that could be another article educating the laity or on how to educate the laity, since just like leadership we have a fine line of discerning without being judgmental gripers to walk?
Thanks!
This is so true! I lived through this and came out on the other side! It was hard, so hard! But it was also so worth it. I followed a very successful Pastor that served our church for 50 years. There was a small handful that didn’t want me there. Their hatred and anger was so intense that they would have rather the church totally failed rather than me have an inch of success. I learned several things through this:
1- stick it out! Some left on there own and others we had to ask to leave. If the Pastor leaves, the cycle will continue to repeat itself and the church remains unhealthy. For us, it took 30 months. When the last family left, the spirit changed the next Sunday. Fewer in number? Yes, but a sweet spirit. The church began to grow shortly thereafter.
2-while difficult, I learned to lean on God like never before. I wouldn’t want to repeat it again, but I wouldn’t take anything for how I grew as a follower of Christ and as a leader.
3- find a mentor. You need someone outside the church and your wife that you can cry with, pour your heart out to and that can offer perspective from the outside. I wouldn’t have made it without a mentor.
Just prayed for all that are going through this. It’s not easy, but please don’t quit Pastor. Your church needs you!!
Robbie,
Encouraging to read your story. I, too, followed a 52-year pastorate and it did not end for me so well. It was my decision to leave, but they made it so toxic that is was impossible to stay. In my situation, my predecessor and his family remained in the church. They were essentially my “10%” and there was no way around them. Very glad that is persevered and turned around for your church.
I’m doing well now, but I grieve for my former church that continues a downward spiral since I left.
Great article! Immediately after a critical board meeting, I had 3 resignations on my desk. The next day I had 6 positive people stop by the office and said, “Pedal to the metal. We have never had a pastor stand up to the few, loud negative people. Let’s go!” We had significant growth over the next 5 years!!!! Thanks be to God!
Love it!
Good words Thom. We recently announced a change to our service time/day to reach a greater number of unchurched people in our area. The 10% demonstrated their faith in preference over God’s priorities in so many if the ways you mentioned above.
I was reminded by a friend to “count your ‘yes’ votes.” And there is a ‘yes’ vote that outweighs all of them, God’s.
I had to ask myself, “Do I follow God’s leading, or do I follow the people?” The answer was easy enough when I put it that way. The courage to execute, the strength to wrestle with God over following him was not easy at all.
And it will be worth it…whatever the cost.
Yes!
The 10% are entrenched on the finance and personnel committees.
It’s not just the numbers that matter. Where those 10% are in church leadership matters, too.
And to those who think it’s easy to get new leaders…have you really been in a long-established Baptist church?
Great points, Doug.